"To whom much is given, much is expected." I have always been familiar with this aphorism since I was a kid. I have always related to it. But today, I find myself in a different role - being the one who expects.
What did I learn? With great expectations come great disappointments. I should have known better. I have been there, being the one bombarded with pressures to meet the expectations of others. I should have understood. I should have done better than just push and push harder. But, what else can I do? What choices do I have? What amends can I make? It was what I felt. Strongly disappointed. Discouraged. Because I greatly expected. I hoped too much.
Now, who's to blame? I don't really know. What I do know is the blame can't be fired at one side alone. In all humility, I accept my part. In all humility, I accept the consequences.
Or maybe, it was really I who was at fault. Because, the disappointment consumes me more than anything now. The disappointment made me think that I was acting for the sake of reacting to a stimulus initiated by another. I thought it was justified. I thought I was being rational.
Understand. There's no better solution but to widen one's understanding. The questions to be asked really are
To what extent should one understand?
Till when one should understand?
If one understands, then why not the other?
How about some action?
How about some concrete, tangible action?
Stop.
There I go again.
Stop.
05/12/10
3:04 pm
What did I learn? With great expectations come great disappointments. I should have known better. I have been there, being the one bombarded with pressures to meet the expectations of others. I should have understood. I should have done better than just push and push harder. But, what else can I do? What choices do I have? What amends can I make? It was what I felt. Strongly disappointed. Discouraged. Because I greatly expected. I hoped too much.
Now, who's to blame? I don't really know. What I do know is the blame can't be fired at one side alone. In all humility, I accept my part. In all humility, I accept the consequences.
Or maybe, it was really I who was at fault. Because, the disappointment consumes me more than anything now. The disappointment made me think that I was acting for the sake of reacting to a stimulus initiated by another. I thought it was justified. I thought I was being rational.
Understand. There's no better solution but to widen one's understanding. The questions to be asked really are
To what extent should one understand?
Till when one should understand?
If one understands, then why not the other?
How about some action?
How about some concrete, tangible action?
Stop.
There I go again.
Stop.
05/12/10
3:04 pm
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